Monday, February 21, 2011

Moss v Lohan in bed

Johnny Depp and Kate Moss 1994


Agent Triple P has never been an admirer of Kate Moss; he thinks she is a ghastly, South London chain-smoking, cocaine-sniffing slapper with an ordinary little body who happens to be blessed with a pair of photogenic cheekbones.  In a society less enthralled by celebrity she should rightfully have been jailed by now.  In this view, however, Triple P does feel somewhat in the minority.  His late lamented friend R used the Kate Moss scale to assess Russian prostitutes in St Petersburg:  Kate Moss plus one, Kate Moss plus two etc.   Triple P's problem with this was that he rated Kate Moss so low that the St Petersburg working girls seemed far off the top of a scale that had her as the base line.

Triple P's friend, B, also, inexplicably, seems to think that Moss deserves her style icon billing and sent us this picture of Moss with, then boyfriend, Johnny Depp as an exemplar of eroticism suitable for our dressed man/ undressed woman theme.  This picture was taken by Annie Leibovitz at  the Royalton Hotel in New York in 1994.  Now we like Mr Depp as an actor and he looks appropriately adoring in this picture, whereas Moss exudes all the sexual energy of a puppet whose strings have been cut.  Pictures of genuine couples should always carry an erotic charge that pictures of non-involved models can't match but this picture is somewhat flat.


Petey Wright and Lindsay Lohan 2009


One person who did like the picture, howver, was Lindsay Lohan who was inspired by the photograph for a photo set shot for Muse magazine's winter 2009 issue.  She got photographer Yu Tsai to pose her with model Petey Wright on a bed for what she hoped would be an "iconic" shoot.  The picture is a disaster and makes the Leibovitz photograph lool like a masterpiece (which it isn't). 


Collagen!


Lohan, sporting a suspiciously plumped up trout pout, looks like trailer trash, the cigarette adding to the downmarket effect (amazingly, Leibovitz had managed to get Moss to put down her cigarette for a few minutes).  The effect of having the man dressed is also lost; two naked bodies are not as interesting as one naked and one dressed.   In fact, a slightly more interesting shot from this pictorial (which also, in some pictures, includes another girl) is this one of a dressed Lohan and a naked Wright.




All in all Lohan manages to do something Triple P wouldn't have thought possible: make Kate Moss look classy.

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